Archive for March, 2010

If there is any way to measure equality in this land it should be by seeing who is now at the top of the Anti-Christ list.

For those not familiar with the term, it is the worldly counter to the Messiah. someone who works for the devil, is pleasant to look at, popular and charismatic. It is someone who will steer people away from God in the last days. As a child, even the word “anti-Christ” conjured up pictures from horror movies–Jason, Swamp Thing, Dracula.

The people who were up for the role as anti-Christ have all been white up until the last few years. Martin Luther said the AC was the Vatican, others thought it was Peter the Great. Many priests and world leaders have won the top spot in past centuries.

Then we move to recent times and Prince Charles. How he passes the “attractive” requisite, not quite sure. Then there was Henry Kissinger whose name somehow adds up to 666. There was Clinton and Putin and even the dudes who go around proclaiming themselves to be the Anti-Christ.

A few years ago the big news was that it was Oprah. A woman! A black woman. Her new age ideas, and perhaps that she tried to get people to read books, got her scooted up on the anti-ladder. This theory came to me in a forwarded email. The message was earnest and cautionary. Just type in “Oprah Anti-Christ” in youtube and you will find many, delightful videos to prove it is true.

Or peruse some websites:

Of course, new polls have revealed that 14% of republicans think President Obama is the Anti-Christ. He does sort-of fit the bill. I can’t see him walk onto a stage without hearing “Sharp Dressed Man” playing in my head.

And what does it say that the two most powerful people in America these days are black? And one, a woman? Does it say that they are so hated that they top the anti-Christ list? Does it mean we are reaching equality? Or are people so angry that blacks are successful that their success qualifies them for the most repugnant, religious character of all time?

Barack Obama
world savior and current U.S. President

Vladimar Putin is the current leader of Russia.

Bill Gates is more of a pop culture addition to the list than a realistic candidate for Antichrist.

Muammar Gaddafi has been very quiet since the west bombed his headquarters in the mid 80’s.

Mikhail Gorbachev was initially added to the list by people’s suspicion over his reforms.

King Jaun Carlos wins the most votes in the bloodline category.Some folks say he’s related to early Roman Emperors.

Ban Ki-moon is the head of the United Nations.

Prince Charles and His Son William are two of Europe’s most
well-known royal figures.

Tony Blair
is the former Prime Minster of England, and he has now taken on a special role as Middle East peacemaker.


Matthew 11

Posted: March 25, 2010 in Uncategorized
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It would be ridiculous to keep following the premise that Matthew wrote this book. Scholars know it and even my ignorant eye picked this up. Perhaps we should adopt the more often used “Book of Matthew,” which it certainly is.

Perhaps a young Jew-lad named Dudley wrote this book. Why not? Dudleys never make the front pages of anything and, back in the day when these things were written, these stories were word of mouth until someone got a chance (usually decades after the events) to write them down.

Obviously Dudley didn’t get a date to the Feast of the Tabernacles gala at the temple that night. Just him and the oil lamp, he snuck into his sister, Moira’s, lean-to and stole the papyrus Uncle Ira gave her for her Bat Mitzvah. Grinding up some goat fat with the coal shavings in the bowl and pestle (the same vessel that will one day lead to the culinary inventions of pesto, salsa and Cesar salad dressing) Dudley began to write the stories that he’d heard all his little life.

Whether an angel came down and dictated to Dudley or he wrote the stories from memory, it is each reader’s opinion. It is a huge leap for me to realize that the words in red on my page are the actual words of Jesus if the writer did not live in the same time as Jesus—but I’m a gonna try and go with it for now.

The chapter starts out with Crazy John the Baptist in jail. And here comes Jesus to defend him. He tells people that John the Baptist was meant to come, meant to lay the way for him, meant to…um, go to jail…and be, um tortured.

Jesus validates John by saying the kingdom is at hand and “only forceful men lay hold of it.” This little verse is used by the C Street politicians in D.C. to validate taking over government, schools and people’s rights. I heard the leader, Doug Coe, say if you think Jesus was loving, you’ve got it wrong. He came to “take over.” This kind of thinking scares the hell into me.

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Next verse:

TMZ Alert:  Jesus says that others judged him by saying, “here comes a glutton and a drunkard.” What? I must have missed this delicious gossip! I never knew that people were labeling Jesus as a drunk. How that changes things.  Not only does it shoot to hell, once again, the Baptist no drinking policy, but it shows that Jesus is that rebel—that law breaker who does things to draw attention to injust laws and social taboos.

Got this from a kid's coloring book.

(I had a small convo via facebook about this. It was about oppressed people risking their lives to come into our country. It is a sad state of affairs. No one wants people flooding in and taking advantage of our country. But it was interesting to note the no-sympathy/empathy take of people who say a “sin is a sin,” no takes back, without thinking about the painful circumstances that lead to the law-breaking.)


Then “Jesus began to denounce the cities in which most of his miracles had been performed.” Yikes. So, he did the miracles right there in front of them, they didn’t go for it and then he curses them saying they will be judged harshly, they will go to the “depths,” and if he’d done those miracles in Tyre and Sidon, they would have repented.

I might ask him why he didn’t, since this is a bit of a mark on his resume.

If I looked at each verse, I could get a whole blog, or at least start a tax-free cult—out of each verse. Verse 27 has Jesus saying “no one knows the Father…except those the Son CHOOSES to reveal him.” So, salvation ain’t for everyone, according to this.

The last verse is familiar to me. It is a call to the weary—“I am gentle (sort of a short memory there) and gentle in heart, and you will find rest in your souls.” Now, here is the Jesus I was attracted to.

And I miss this Jesus.  When Haiti happened, I was a mess. I had been a missionary there for a few months in 1989. I knew of the Pat Roberson curse and I believed it as I held abandoned sick babies while they peed orange onto my skirt.

The day of the earthquake, someone posted on facebook that s/he thanked Jesus for the nice weather so that s/he could accomplish some work outdoors. I was irate that people think an Omniscient being would give them nice weather while 200,000 people were destroyed in 35 seconds.

Still believing in prayer that day would have been nice. I was powerless and sick to my stomach. I would have loved to believe that my prayer was helping those orphans and amputees at that moment. It is a comforting thought and now I have no comforting thought. I DO miss that call from Jesus where he says “you will find rest for your souls,” because actually trying to do something in the tangible world with money and action is difficult and complicated.

So, that’s where I am. And that was only 1 chapter.